State of the Tour Guide

Join me if you will in my den of iniquity. Yes, yes... right in here. It's warm, there's cozy couches -- whoops, really should have put that... away. I'll have words with the house boy, HOUSEBOYGETINHERE -- liquor, tea, coffee, but oh GOD don't drink that unless you want to...!!!

Right. Too late.

...damn. I MUST learn to keep the fun drinks on a higher shelf.

( So quickly, before you get dizzy and lose consciousness... )